I know of one invitation that was absolutely not sent for Thanksgiving:
The Food Police.
In that spirit, here are 4 Rules to Remember to Make Peace with Thanksgiving:
1 - Thanksgiving is about communion - coming together, sharing, connection. Food is a PART of that communion. You can totally choose to focus on the social connection instead of the food.
2 - Division of Responsibility: once it’s on the table - it’s fair game. Everyone gets to decide IF they eat, which foods, and how much. There’s no forcing food on people (ok, you mean you’re not gonna have a slice?!?) which is just as toxic as “don't you think you’ve had enough?”.
3 - No one's weight indicates what or how much they can eat -- that goes for you, that goes for your kid. Your nephew who has put on some weight over the past 2 years is just as open to having an extra slice of pie as your slim niece. Hopefully both are being guided by their hunger - but either way, our input (while may be sent with love, is still a judgement on their weight and what they can eat) -- is NOT needed. Switch the channel in your mind and talk about something else.
“How ‘bout them Eagles this year?!?” (Go Birds!)
4- The more we restrict, the more rules, the more that we naturally want to rebel and have more. Which is why if we restrict on typical days, we may really want to cut loose and eat all the things on Thanksgiving.
Take a breath. It’s ok. One day does not ruin it - even if you happen to be on a diet - it’s one day. A trend, a pattern, is looking at the long-run, not the individual steps. Just keep taking the steps towards the goal and the future that you are creating every darn day. And don’t put so much meaning on a slice of pie.
If you’re hungry, enjoy the pie.
If you’re not, enjoy the company.
Or the peace.
Happy Thanksgiving - happy every meal. Choose which rules are truly helping you along the way.
Check out the Family in Focus with Wendy Schofer, MD Podcast!
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