Sometimes we need others to help with our emotional regulation.
Last night my adrenals were thoroughly wrung out in the stress of hearing the rat trap go off (within 4 hrs of being set), witnessing the carnage and then knowing that it was my job to deal with. Because of course these things always happen on the evening before a long holiday break.
Adrenaline coursed through my arteries as I searched for more critters and did the dirty work of cleaning up.
This morning I awoke at 0430, getting waaaaay less than my needed 9 hrs of sleep.
I ran around on family time (aka slower than when traveling solo), so stressed to get going. Arrived at airport with five minutes to spare to get bags checked.
Got on the plane with zero overhead for my bag, despite paying for premium seat and being on the plane very early. When I asked a next-row passenger to move her bag down to accommodate my bag, I was met with the most un-Thanksgiving response,
"How dare you ask me to move my bag."
I was shook.
I have zero reserve right now. Tears came to my eyes. Anger and irritation and disappointment in humanity and...
My travel buddy wrote out a gentle text to me: "you're not the problem here". (Ok that's not what he said, as we both have sailors' mouths, but we're keeping this clean for Thanksgiving.)
I need him to help me regulate right now.
It's ok to reach out and admit:
I have ZERO reserve right now.
Cortisol is shot
Sleep is crap
Already stressed and now...
Are you kidding me?!
Today I am grateful to be able to reach out and receive emotional support and regulation from those around me: and I am honored that it is my son. He is offering me the kindness and compassion that I need. He is seeing me, not as a problem, but as a human being.
That's what I need right now.
Truly I'm grateful I've created the change I want to see in the world. This is everything.
What is the change you want to create in the world?
Happy Thanksgiving, my friends.
ps - I have a spot open for you to create emotional regulation practices in your home. Email for details: [email protected]
Check out the Family in Focus with Wendy Schofer, MD Podcast!
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